Gitter Family Update – 22 weeks preggers and 18 months old!

I can’t believe that I’m nearing the end of my 22nd week of pregnancy and that Tucker turned 18 months yesterday! It’s all gone by so quickly! I haven’t been very good about keeping up with all that is changing in our lives lately – for the 2 of you that read this but more importantly for me to remember exactly where we, The Gitters, were on June 14, 2012. So here it goes…

Tucker

Our little stinker pot is talking up a storm trying to keep up with his favorite girl in the world, his cousin E – who moved in 2 doors down a few months ago. E is almost three and honestly I don’t think he could love her anymore. Yesterday Jim told me that Tucker wouldn’t let her go through until she gave him a kiss. so, adorable! One of my pregnant epiphanies was creating a Step 2/Little Tikes playground in our backyard for the kids…it has come to life and a few weeks ago we added the Naturally Playful® Front Porch Playhouse by Step2 – I got a good price and free shipping, and I know the resale value on this stuff is great if kept in good condition. They LOVE it, it took a couple of times out in the yard, but they are so funny in there now. We have a little swing and slide set from Eric’s cousins, a see-saw, the Step2 Clubhouse Climber, a picnic table and umbrella, and of course some of Bogey’s toys. They’ve been having a blast between the Step 2 community and the kiddie pools, sprinklers and the water table they love to live outside!

He’s gotten crazy fast on his feet and is just a tank of a kid and will push you out of the way to get where he wants to be. We are working on manners, and waiting your turn – he’s not so good at those yet. We’ve been experimenting with potty training, which he responds well to, we offer and he says yes or no, with yes he races to the bathroom, and when he says no we just let it be. Before bath we sit on the Elmo seat and if he goes, great if not he’s still pretty little. He’s talking a ton – some of it is still pretty gibberish, but he speaks VERY well for an 18 month old boy. A married couple, and friends of mine from high school own their own photography business, McManigal Photography and have taken all of Tucker’s pictures since he was a newborn – Chris was out at my parents house this past week trying to capture Tucker at 18 months…well it was a challenge to say the least. He was constantly moving, didn’t want to stay anywhere, and wouldn’t laugh at my ridiculous singing and dancing (which I paid for with a very sore pelvis the next day!) . He never sits still anymore and keeps me on my feet – but I must say he and Eric looked SOOOOOOOOO handsome! their outfits were the only thing that turned out how I wanted, we will see if the pictures depicted what I saw in my head- thanks for the lil boy tie Auntie Melly! (:

Tucker has no idea what life has in store for him, we’re working on body parts and he knows mouth, nose, 1 eye 2 eyes, hair, ear, cheek, toes, and fingers. We’re learning belly and trying to explain that the baby is in my belly but he just doesn’t care, and when we’ve tried to get him to gently pat the baby he pounds on my belly like bongo drums. So we will have to try a new approach to the upcoming changes in his life. We have a babysitter who comes to the house on a regular basis now, and we couldn’t LOVE her more! She’s fantastic and Tucker adores her. He has no issues with me leaving in the morning when Katherine is there, he calls her Kath-Kath and he is sufficiently tired after a day with her. We count our blessing everyday for having found her.

Here’s a few recent pictures of Tucker – they are not as numerous as they once were…

Baby Girl Gitter:

She’s a growing girl! I had my first u/s a couple weeks ago, and got a call a couple days after from my midwife’s office suggesting that I do a follow up ultrasound because her femur bone is 20% of her head circumference. Apparently the normal range is 17%-19%, my midwife wasn’t too concerned but per the recommendation of the radiologist we made another appointment for 2 weeks later (tomorrow already!) to check again, I was told it could be a couple of factors – it could be that she’ll be tall, which over all she’s much bigger than Tucker at 20 weeks (Tucker was 49.8% and she is 68.9% but Tucker was born in the 98% weight and 99% height), that she was in a strange position and the measurement could have been off. I couldn’t help but google it, and I couldn’t find anything bad about that – and to be quite honest, it wouldn’t change how much we love her or that God chose us to be her parents, she’s ours as long as God will allow it. So tomorrow we’re going in to see her again on the U/S and watch her twist and turn. I have a serious baby bump going on now – I think looks bigger looking down than in the mirror, but I can still fit into all my heels and I’m not a swollen whale, yet. I am considering a maternity belt, this one sits in my back and causes crazy pain when she lies in a certain spot, and she’s a stubborn one to move, totally my girl! But we’re on the downside of the maternity hill, with less time left than we’ve put in – that’s a good feeling.

A few other milestones in our lives – after we got back from the Bahamas and we Photoshopped a few pictures for our memory book Eric, Matt, LeAnne and I decided to do weight watchers, then I found out I was pregnant and stopped paying the monthly dues but Eric, LeAnne, and Matt all downloaded an app called iTrackBites for $2.99 and have had AMAZING success with it. We no longer have to Photoshop their pictures – Eric is down almost 50 lbs and is the skinniest he’s ever been and LeAnne has lost close to 20 lbs and Matt has lost over 20 lbs! I’m so proud of the three of them, they look so great and are fitting into clothes they haven’t wore in years! At my last appointment with my Midwife, her and her nurse were ooogling over how great Eric looked, and I’m not gonna lie – I was annoyed when she asked how I’ll handle it when our weights criss-cross going in opposite directions, not her most nurturing moment – but I still LOVE her!

We’ve been busy busy keeping up with the great weather, doctors appointments, and Eric’s INSANE summer work schedule! We’re surviving and thriving – some days there is more love than others, but at the end of the day we give thanks to God for all that we have and all He’s done for us. Life is Good as a Gitter my friends!

Dear Tucker & Baby Girl Gitter,

We have been so busy and summer is just beginning! Tucker I LOVE where you are right now – you are so inquizitive about everything, and are starting to figure everything in life out, you’re a massive bundle of energy but for every ounce of GO you have in you, there is an equal amount of snuggles, love, and kisses. You light up our lives in a way that only you can…honestly, out of all the little boys in the whole wide world how did we end up getting the VERY best one?? I can’t wait to enjoy more summer with you at this stage. And baby girl – you need to take it a little bit easier on my body that you are currently residing in, your brother was a lazy fetus and I very much enjoyed that, although I am really loving that your dad can be more involved earlier and feel you squirming and doing martial arts in my belly! We will continue to work on not lying on the bottom of my tailbone, and getting to feel you grow in my belly. Be nice to your mommy – she’s too busy to stop and take a breather these days! The days are moving so fast and I’m making a vow to use the expensive camera that I HAD TO HAVE to capture more of our moments this summer! I love you both so very much, thank you for all the memories you’re giving me (:

♥

mom

Today’s the day

When I was in the shower this morning I thought about my day.  It’s a big day for us, it’s our 20 week ultrasound.  I knew so early that I was pregnant that the half way mark seemed soooo far away, and now it’s here just a few hours away.  So, I’m a planner – I want to know what this baby is.  I know a handful of my friends who decided not to know and it was a magical experience for them, but it’s just me – I want to know and so does Eric.  But he’s so awesome about it, just like when we were here a couple of years ago Eric told me he wanted what I wanted.  He’s so great, I’m so lucky to have him.

So we go in today to the ultrasound at 10:45.  It’s a room that carries so much weight.  All we really ask for is a healthy baby, it’s what the ultrasound is actually for, but that’s a given.  I flash back to hearing the news of our best couple friend, who received heartbreaking news about their first baby in a room similar to one we’ll be in today.  Or the book, I Will Carry You by Angie Smith where they were in a room similar and were given devastating news about their little girl too.  I think about the season finale of Private Practice, I can’t remember crying so hard at a TV show.  I actually have goosebumps as I type this, thinking about that episode.  These thoughts enter my head, but don’t consume like I thought they would.  I think I wouldn’t be normal if they didn’t cross my mind.  My God is with us, I feel him all around me today.

The baby is squirming around right now jabbing the right side of my belly, and I smile thinking about getting to meet our little boy or girl on the screen today.  I’ve been asked quite a few times about what we want…I first answer the obvious answers – a healthy human baby…insert chuckle…and then I tell them if I could choose I’d want another boy.  Most people are surprised by my answer, they assume that I would want a girl to finish off the idea of a perfect American Family.  I love having a boy and the kids will be 21 months apart and there is something to be said about bunkbeds and best friend brothers, I want that.  I have 2 princess nieces a football field away from our house who I LOVE spoiling with girly girl things.

I feel like it’s another boy.  This pregnancy is so much like when I was pregnant with Tucker.  But we will see in a few hours.  I’ll be back with an update and some kind of fun revealing picture.  Have a good Friday morning!!

Karma…the ultimate parenting kick in the a$$or

I can’t count how many times I have judged someone for a parenting choice they made before I had Tucker.  Maybe a million, or a jillion times I said, “When we have kids I’m never gonna do ________”  or “my kids will be looking good all the time, they won’t have snot dripping or googey hair and their clothes will match when we go out in public.”

Man almighty, I can’t even tell you how many times these words have bit my butt in the last 16 months.  It really hit me when I was volunteering at a Little Warriors Event and I saw a little boy (maybe 4) running around in cowboy boots, a baseball cap, plaid shorts, a superhero t-shirt and a weird belt.  Pre-Tucker I would have raised my eyebrows at the parents and commented that OUR child will never leave the house like that…fast forward to now – I wouldn’t say that, and now I think “she picks her battles and this obviously isn’t one of them.”  I’m really working on not judging but watching.  Although my current battles are not what Tucker is going to wear, but more so what he cannot have, he cannot have the remote or knives or our glasses full of liquids.  He cannot watch ELMO 24 hours a day, he cannot climb on the dishwasher door, he cannot hit the dog and he cannot have cookies for every meal.  These are my battles I face daily (well we (Eric, the babysitter and grandparents depending on the day) face daily).  I hope that someday a mom can look at my kid dressed array, or eating cookies, and realize that wasn’t the battle I chose today.

Although there comes a point where I have to choose the battle that Eric and I deem important.  I got a daily parenting tip from one of my favorite websites iMOM.  Inconvenience the Price of Good Parenting.  I feel like enough homage cannot be paid to my parents…I never paid it growing up, but I never knew how smart they were until I was a grown up.  They didn’t do everything right all the time, but they chose their battles, and battled each of us as a united front.  We also grew up in a very close knit family – our whole family.  Here is a picture of us – heading out on our second Disney family vacation and our first Disney Cruise.  I’ll never forget that trip, I had spaghetti every night, and Giuseppe cut it up so fast and so cool, I just had to see it done again and again.  And yes that is me the ‘star’ in the front middle…I loved to be me!

Eric and I have talked about family trips in the future with the kids, Disney is a must, I loved Disney and I want our kids to have a life as wonderful as we both did.  I chatted with my mom and asked why we never did anything like a timeshare and more far distance family vacations, (we went up north to our family cottage every year and did Six Flags, and other things) and she very promptly explained that we we drove them nuts at home and local vacations fighting for much less money.  Why pay for something if we weren’t going to enjoy it, your father and I chose vacations that we enjoyed and you guys were you guys wherever we were – always at eachother’s throats.  She was right, a key point in my Maid of Honor speech at LeAnne’s wedding was about how there were at least 3 babysitters sitting in the audience who I can’t believe went on to have kids after babysitting for us (: hehe!

I ponder what my mom said, and I can’t help but wonder if it’s a pipe dream to think that this perfect little family we’re almost done creating can live happily ever after and enjoy wonderful family vacations together and they will be perfect angels and we’ll just float around loving our little perfect family vacations?  The reality is: Yes Patty that is a pipe dream…this is what your future holds:

Reality, karma, they’ll never stop kicking my butt – but if they did, what would I blog about?  Here’s to choosing our battles and planning vacations that Eric and I enjoy – and hoping that our enjoyment will spread to our kids the way it did for us.

Dear Tucker,

 

You sure are growing up fast!  Your dad I are learning everyday about how strong willed, determined, and smart you are.  Those darling brown eyes will only work on this tough mom for so much longer (:  I think I might be a mean mom, but my favorite face you make is your pouty one – the one you give me when you don’t get your way or you’re in bogey’s food again.  It’s the cutest little face with so much expression, I just can’t help but giggle…I need to work on tough love parenting!  You’re getting faster on your feet everyday, and although you have no idea what to think about this baby growing inside my tummy – you always get a big smile when someone asks you if you’re going to be a big brother.  I adore that smile too, that pure, sweet, contagious, effervescent smile – it’s contagious we can’t help but smile right back at you!  You’re a treasure to us, and we love you so much my little monster.  

♥

mom

Vacation and my irrational fears.

So as Eric would say, I was a bit, well, emotional about leaving for our trip to the Bahamas.  A trip that we as a happily married couple desperately needed.  Time away to remember why we are together, without having to discuss who will be driving before we go out, watching what we drink, or ‘discussing’ who will get up and take care of the baby or who’s turn it is to take out the dog.  We got a week of pampering, warm sunny weather, and  millions memories that we’ll never forget.

Before we left, for at least 4 months, when the trip was mentioned my pulse would race, and I’d have chest tightness, the thought of leaving my baby for an entire week was petrifying to me.  I felt guilty, I’m a full time working woman and mom, and I already feel like I don’t get enough time with Tucker, and to take 8 whole days off of work and not spend ANY of that time with him, well, made me feel awful.  And without even knowing – my feelings were being projected onto Eric, and he was feeling that I just didn’t want to getting away with him.  *BTW not the case at all*.  There didn’t seem to be much that I could do to subside these feelings and make Eric understand the maternal working mom in me.  I gave up and a week before we left I had our monthly church council meeting.  At the end we break up into groups and ask Jesus to help with something that we are struggling with in our lives, Pastor was in our group, and I asked for calmness about our upcoming trip and peace knowing that Tucker is well taken care of with my mom and dad and Eric’s mom and dad.  Pastor Jay said something that hit me and helped me to find peace, “Help Patty to see that the Union that You created between her and Eric is the most important because it was made in your eyes.”  I may be paraphrasing here, but he’s right, God created our union, and from that beautiful union created and sealed on February 24, 2007 – came Tucker, another one of God’s wonderful creations.  But he’ll be grown up someday and find a woman to share that union with that was created by God, and I hope he puts all he has into it, the way his dad, papa, and grandpa does.

So one of my fears is that we would leave and after 8 days come back and Tucker would look totally different, talk in full sentences, be running around, and I guess do so much that we would have missed.  Since he got so big, he wouldn’t remember that Mama is his favorite person in the world, and everything would just be different.  I am sure I am not the only parent to have these crazy irrational fears.

So 8 days in paradise, overindulging in food, alcohol, sun, water, fun and my husband we got home late and I HAD to wake up Tucker.  He didn’t look different, and he opened one eye, looked up at me, and said “mama?” a big smile and then a squeel, “MAMA!” he got right up and I swooped him up and gobbled all the kisses he attacked me with.  He was different, he learned a few new words and mannerisms, he wasn’t walking yet, and I was still his favorite.  It didn’t take long to get right back into the swing of things, but it was so much easier to do with a tan.  Our vacation that ended 8 days ago already feels like years ago and normal is back.  Everyday of our vacation from the moment we stepped on the grounds of Sandals Emerald Bay I got to forgot about being a mom, a dog owner, and became a wife, a book reader, a tanning beauty, a swimmer, and let loose.  I can’t imagine that when we do another trip away from Tucker, I won’t have some anxiety but it’s good to know that I can do it, I can have a great time with my husband and not feel the weight of mom guilt hang over me.  I am grateful that God gave us the financial and physical means to take a trip like this.  We are blessed.  Life is good.  Being a mom is great, but being a wife is amazing.

Dear Tucker,

 

I made it through leaving you, and you know what?  I’m a better mom for it.  I absolutely loved having time away with your dad, it’s something that we really needed to be a better mom and dad.  You had such a good week and your Granny and Papa and Grandma and Grandpa LOVED having you all to themselves.  Papa told me that they got to know you so much better and had such fun watching you learn all sorts of new things.  Grandma told me that you loved having sleepovers at the Bear’s house and you were such a good boy.  They both told me what a good sleeper you were for them.  I love that you’re such a good boy for them, now we will work on the good sleeper thing for mom and dad, you’re not bad but there’s always room for improvement.  (like going down better for naps).  We love you in spite of your reluctance to take 2 naps anymore.  You make me smile and make my heart melt Tuckey-roo.  I love you.  

 

♥

mom

slacker here.

So I’m a blogger slacker.  This new year has already been crazy busy, after this month things will hopefully slow down and we can get back into the groove of things again.  Eric and I are celebrating our 5 year anniversary soon in the Bahamas.  I have been really looking forward to it, but dreading it all at the same time.  Which led to my/our New Year’s Resolution.

Eric and I had a big talk.  I’m a big talker, and while I was pregnant I vowed not to be one of those moms who sleep with their kids and let their ENTIRE worlds revolve around their kids and leave their husbands in the dust.  But I became one of those moms, it’s so easy to just become what you never wanted to be.  I have not been neglectful to Eric, just not as attentive as I should be.  After all, my marriage to Eric was created in the eyes of God and it is what I will have long after Tucker and his unmade unborn brother(s)/sister(s) are out of our house.  I adore my husband, he’s such an amazing man, but I am just plain old exhausted at the end of the day and we are both so busy at night that when we find a babysitter it’s so I can run to council, do volunteer work, get stuff done for church, do stuff for work or a very rare night out with the girls, and Eric in the winter Eric works at night, so we use our babysitters for life events, very rarely do we use them for us time.  Well this year we are going to make it a priority.  We have set aside one night every month for just us.  I bought a groupon for tubing at a local ski hill for our February date night (:  We also talked about getting away for a night with just us at least 3 times this year.  Doesn’t have to be anything too fancy but we are really needing time for us.  We both love eachother everyday and like eachother more days than not, but knowing that isn’t just enough.

There’s a country song called, “the best of intentions”.  An ex-boyfriend once told me that song was written about him, he had all the grandest dreams to give me so much that he said I deserved.  Well the song was right, he did always have the best of intentions, but if they never become reality, what good are they?  I wasted 5 years with that loser, and until I met Eric I had no idea that guys gave more than intentions, they give their everything.  I found a box of old cards that we have given eachother while I was looking for our marriage and my birth certificates, and I remember when it was puppy love, but the amazing thing is, is that our cards have just gotten more sincere, and the words written in them more meaningful when our actions behind them have made our wonderful reality we have today.

A few years ago Eric called me at work and asked me if I could get a couple vacation days so we could go out to NYC for one of the last Yankees games, I told him I’d see.  I ‘like’ sports, when I know the teams and when I’m there in person, but to go out to NYC pay money for nosebleed seats and watch 2 teams play baseball who I only know 1 player wasn’t my cup of tea.  I called my mom to discuss (which is what I do for just about everything) and she said something that rang so loud in my head I have never forgot it.  “Patty Lou, do you know just how lucky you are?  You have a husband who adores you and wants to go with you on a trip like this, when your father and I were your age, there’s no way I’d be the first person he’d ask to go on a sporting trip.  Go, and enjoy yourselves and bask in the fact that he loves to be with you and wants to invite you into what he likes.”  I am one lucky girl, I know that.  I love my husband, I love my baby, and I love my dog.  My life is great and I give thanks to God for all that we have been given.

Dear Tucker,

I can’t even begin to count the blessings that God has given me.  Before you were here, I promised so many things that I would and would not do.  I guess if you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans, right?  It’s so easy to cast my opinions about what we will and won’t do as parents when we aren’t ones.  Now we are and I had begun to forget about what was first and what will be here long after you’ve grown up, your dad and I.  We are so lucky to have him in our lives.  He’s a great man, he takes such good care of you during the day, and keeps the house in order.  He makes me feel special and just by being him, I remember how great my life is.  Just because Dad and I are going to start taking more time for ourselves doesn’t mean that we don’t love you as much, we’re spending time together because we love you so much!  And there are so many other people that love you and want to spend time with you that we want everyone to get their chance.  I love you to the moon and back Tuckey-roo!

♥

mom